Tuesday, August 11, 2015

A Sad Loss


Mom- Thanksgiving 2012- Age 81

I do not usually write much personal 'stuff' in this blog, but I would be remiss if I didn't post about our recent sad days.

I haven't posted in quite awhile, and my stitching needles have been idle.   I am extremely sad to say that my dear mother passed away in late July.  She'd lived with us for almost four years, and her health had declined considerably through those years.  Given her severe health issues, it is a blessing she lived as long as she did.  She went from being a fiercely independent, physically active person to one who was dependent on us for many things.  Mom no longer drove, and she was essentially housebound for a few years except for trips to the doctor. Any small exertion caused her great respiratory distress, and it was difficult to see her suffer.   She hadn't even wanted to go to the hairstylist since late November.  That was a huge change for her.

 Mom had declined much since January, and in early July an acute situation arose and she was extremely weak.  We took her to the hospital, and she was never able to return to our home again.

Like me, she was a 'homebody', and her greatest joy was to be here surrounded by her family and friends.  We are grateful that given her health issues she was able to be in her home until the last eighteen days of her life.  My husband and I relocated here almost four years ago, and we were happy to all be together in one home.

What a fantastic cook and baker she was, before her illness prevented her from doing those things. She loved to dote on people, and care for others. When she was younger she was a nurse, and she loved her job.  Her energy was boundless.

We celebrated her birthday about a week before she entered the hospital, and there were tweny of us here together. This included her living children, their partners, grandchildren, their partners,  and great -grandchildren. Only one grandchild wasn't here.  She hadn't really wanted the party as she felt poorly, but I am glad we did it.

She passed away peacefully in her sleep, which is a blessing in itself.  We are heartened to know she is now with our father, brother, and others who have passed before. She lost her beloved dog in December, and we'd like to think that her darling dog is with her, too.

My mom was the world to me.  She was something else, a real 'hoot', as one person said. She was very opinionated, but very kind and loving. She'd lived in this home for forty-seven years this summer.  It has been our home too for almost four years,  and it is odd to be here without her by our side. I do feel her spirit in all I do, and I am sure that we will miss her the rest of our lives.

So soon I may stitch again.  It has just been a lot to absorb. My mom did start to stitch a dish towel in January, and I finished it for her this summer--finishing it for her on her June birthday. I will post a photo of that soon.

Mom loved poems. Here's one she really enjoyed:

                                              If I can stop one heart from
                                               breaking,
                                               I shall not live in vain.
                                               If I can ease one life
                                                the aching,
                                               Or cool one pain,
                                               Or help one fainting robin
                                               Unto his nest again,
                                               I shall not live in vain.
                                                          Emily Dickenson

7 comments:

  1. So sorry to hear of your loss.

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  2. So sorry for your loss. Words are inadequate. Sending hugs and prayers your way.

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  3. I remember you and when you commented today on my blog I was like: could it be that same lady from a few years ago...and guess what?! It was...
    My heart breaks for you to read of your Mom's passing. She was lucky to have you and your husband to live with her in her final years. Your Mom sounds a lot like me...people say I'm a "hoot" if pressed to describe me and I'm blunt as they come too :) Good traits I say! To be a nurse and care for those in need of care I know you must have considered her honor and to be cared for when she needed it by her you, her family and friends I know must have made her feel safe, secure and loved. This was an amazing tribute to her and tonight when I pray my night prayers I shall remember your Mama, but most especially her loved ones she left behind. She is in her glory now, and those she loved left with her memories. My prayers are with you! Thank you for sharing your Mom with us!

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  4. Thanks so much, Vonna. Your words made me cry, and that is a good thing. I appreciate your prayers. It is tough, but I always have read that 'grief is the price of love."I feel very blessed that we had time with her, especially in the last years of sharing a household.

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  5. I'm sorry for your loss. I do understand your pain as I have lost both of my parents. We too moved into their home to care for them in their last years. ((hugs))

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  6. Thank you Eskimo's Wife for your condolences. It helps to know others understand and have 'been there'.

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